When we made plans for the kids to make their second annual trip to Grandma’s house, it came with a lot of hand-wringing on my part. Last year we were so lost without them! I felt like I had a big weight on my shoulders! They missed us immensely! Do they really need to go?

We asked the kids what they wanted to do and they immediately replied with GO TO GRANDMA’S HOUSE and they counted down the “sleeps” until we left and not even an hour into the (six hour) drive, Nathan asked: “Are we at the ferry boat yet?

Matthew and I made plans to cope the exact same way we did last year – get away from our (empty, deathly quiet) house except for those blissful nighttime hours in our pillow-top king-sized bed. Unfortunately for me, he made plans to go fishing with his brother Monday afternoon/evening (Yay! Fishing! He loves fishing!) which saw me alone in our (monstrous, deathly quiet) house.

I tried to make the best of it. The rest of our days and evenings are packed to the brim with work (only today – I have another four-day weekend) and barbecues with friends and shopping and watching a movie (Eclipse, last night) and day trips and adventures that will be well-documented with my camera. I decided that I would work ahead on some of my freelance stuff so that I could truly have some days “off”.

But then I called the kids to say good night and they all whimpered about how much they missed me and Emily and Nathan flat-out lost it and I hung up the phone with tears in my eyes. And THEN, my Internet decided to crap out. I did the whole unplug everything/plug it back in trick and still nothing and I called technical support and after FORTY-FIVE MINUTES on the phone with him he confirmed that it was an issue on their end and that I should just check it every half an hour. Dude. I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.

Matthew came home in the middle of it all and was so! excited! about the fish he caught and I was all, “I’m happy for you but TONIGHT IS NOT GOING WELL FOR ME.” And then I turned into a blubbering mess because I had something due today and the STUPID SATELLITE INTERNET wasn’t working on a PERFECTLY BEAUTIFUL DAY and COMPUTER ISSUES MAKE ME DO THE HULK SMASH and I AM A HORRIBLE MOM because MY KIDS MISS ME and I MISS THEM and yet I’M STILL HERE and THEY’RE STILL THERE and MAYBE TONIGHT WASN’T THE BEST NIGHT TO LEAVE ME ALL BY MYSELF.

(I didn’t actually yell – by the time those thoughts made it through the snot and tears it was more of a muted whiney sound.)

So, I packed up my computer and went to a friend’s house to get my stuff done and came back home and we mutually agreed that we should just talk in the morning and I went to bed. I hit the gym in the morning, then called him after my class. Me: “Sorry I was so emotional.” Him: “Sorry I was so insensitive.” And all is right in the world again.

It pains me whenever I talk to the kids but we’re doing the best we can to enjoy this time that we have as just the two of us. Our plans for Thursday and Friday have me ridiculously excited (Photo opportunities galore!) and I know that the days will fly by. Then, Friday night, my babies will be back in the fold. As for now, we are okay.

More than okay, really.

* Joshua Radin. I heart his music.

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  1. Eric's Mommy July 7, 2010 5:39 am edit

    Aw, hang in there Angella :)

    I miss my Son terribly when he stays at his Grandparent’s house and they are only 30 minutes away. This past 4th of July weekend he stayed 2 nights there and I missed him so much.

  2. Sizzle July 7, 2010 8:07 am edit

    Love Joshua Radin.

    It’s sweet that you miss them though I know it is hard. I hope you can enjoy your next few days!
    .-= Sizzle´s last blog ..Sizzleland Snippets =-.

  3. Kami's Khlopchyk July 7, 2010 8:25 am edit

    This just proves that you are the best mommy for your kids! You wouldn’t miss each other otherwise :)

    I am sorry you had such a rough night. My internet craps out on me all the time and I live in the city. Nothing can make me stabby like internet crapping out when there is work to do that requires said internet. In other words? I hear you. Add kids 6 hours aways and you probably handled things much better than I would.

    .-= Kami’s Khlopchyk´s last blog ..Its Summer- =-.

  4. monstergirlee July 7, 2010 8:34 am edit

    It’ll be Ok, your kids will be home soon.
    And I think it just shows how much of an awesome Mom you are that they miss you so much, even tho they’re so excited to be at Grandma’s house.
    I can’t wait to peruse your photo stream and see all the new photos!
    Enjoy your quiet time, since you must :-)
    .-= monstergirlee´s last blog ..Happy Independence Day- =-.

  5. samantha jo campen July 7, 2010 9:18 am edit

    I think I said on FB that I’m good with quiet time as long as I can decide when it’s over. Like a magic shuttle that can plop Theo at home as soon as I decide. But sadly it doesn’t work like that.

    Wish I could come hang out with you! OH MAN THE FUN WE’D HAVE.

    Hugs to you my friend.


  6. Miss Britt July 7, 2010 9:20 am edit

    “It pains me whenever I talk to the kids but we’re doing the best we can to enjoy this time that we have as just the two of us.”

    Yes. Exactly. We’re keeping our schedule ridiculously busy but when I hear their little voices… my heart breaks. And then my daughter stopped wanting to talk to me on the phone because it made her sad. :-(
    .-= Miss Britt´s last blog ..Tiny Beds and Big Birthdays =-.

  7. Heather @ Domestic Extraordinaire July 7, 2010 10:43 am edit

    I am glad to hear that you are doing okay and you know, before you know it the week will be over and they will be home and asking again when they can go back to Grandma’s house.
    .-= Heather @ Domestic Extraordinaire´s last blog ..A Wise Man Once Said =-.

  8. hillary July 7, 2010 11:07 am edit
  9. Kerri Anne July 7, 2010 11:36 am edit

    It’s days like these that make me wish I lived close enough to hop in the car and come hang out. Sending you huge hugs from here, babe.

    And YAY Joshua Radin. I love that man’s voice.
    .-= Kerri Anne´s last blog ..Snapshots Of A Season In Progress =-.

  10. Amanda Brown July 7, 2010 11:47 am edit

    Sounds like you’ve made some great plans and good memories already. I am still in that stage when any break I get from my kids is a heavenly and blissful experience and it takes me a while to really miss them. I think it’s because they are giant turds a lot of the time. :)

    Supermom, out!
    .-= Amanda Brown´s last blog ..Signs of the Times =-.

  11. Meg July 7, 2010 1:11 pm edit

    Awwwwwww, hugs lady!
    .-= Meg´s last blog ..I love myself today not like yesterday =-.

  12. gorillabuns July 7, 2010 2:11 pm edit

    it’s funny. Rich and I plan to have some time away from the kids like a date night, and all we do is talk about the kids and can’t wait to hurry home to see them.

    if they were gone longer than a night, i know i would go nutty. okay, nuttier.

  13. Hannah July 7, 2010 2:25 pm edit

    Oh, man. Internet issues when you have work deadlines? I totally know what that’s like!!! When it happens to me, EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD CEASES TO MATTER. My entire focus is on FIXING MY PROBLEM. So yeah, totally know about the snot and the crying and the blubbering and the not caring about your husband’s awesome fish. But glad you managed to get your work done and that you & Matthew talked. ENJOY your 2 days together, fill them up with things that keep you busy and just look forward to a wonderful reunion with your gorgeous kiddos. I know how hard this is for you. Huge, huge HUGS!! xx
    .-= Hannah´s last blog ..Proud of my boys- =-.

  14. alimartell July 7, 2010 2:33 pm edit

    aw. I’m glad you’re good now.
    I have been there. HUGS.

    also, I am DREADING the day I have to send the kids to overnight camp. I know I will be a weepy mess.
    .-= alimartell´s last blog ..Stepford Road Trip Anyone =-.

  15. Ashley Stone July 7, 2010 3:18 pm edit

    Isn’t it awesome that you miss them?! Everyone needs a break from their kidlets sometimes but it makes me really sad when you hear people who’s kids have been gone for 3 weeks say they didn’t miss them.

    My mom always reminds me that missing my kids is a good mommy thing. Because it means I love them enough to let them go do something fun, and I need them enough to miss them.

    Hope the next few days fly by without tears and full of laughter and fun!
    .-= Ashley Stone´s last blog ..From the Soapbox – Sun Safety- =-.

  16. Jen Wilson July 7, 2010 5:43 pm edit

    Goodness. That night of SUCKAGE did not sound fun.

    Hope you get some sort of enjoyment out of your next few days until the kiddos get home. :)
    .-= Jen Wilson´s last blog ..lili logic =-.

  17. Elaine July 7, 2010 7:01 pm edit

    Sorry about your very bad, not so good night.

    But I can’t wait to hear about when you are all reunited. It’s gonna be so sweet. Just like your family.
    .-= Elaine´s last blog ..How I Birthed and Fed My Babies- Judge Me NOT =-.

  18. Kristabella July 9, 2010 1:09 pm edit

    It’s too bad I didn’t live closer! YOU WOULD NOT BE SAD!! ONLY TEARS FROM LAUGHING SO HARD!

    Enjoy the kidlets when they come back! :)
    .-= Kristabella´s last blog ..So Maybe I’m Not Ready For Kids =-.

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