May 13, 2013

Flesh Of My Flesh

Mother’s Day can be a hard day for many people. I get it. I lost my first child due to a miscarriage. If I didn’t have the three living, breathing, RIDICULOUSLY AWESOME children, I’d probably hate Mother’s Day, too. But I have three living, breathing, RIDICULOUSLY AWESOME children. I thank God for them every day.

I am not a perfect Mom, but I am a good Mom. They are not perfect children, but they are great children. They are the reason that I make school lunches, and drive to third grade running races, and help out with first grade journals. They are the reason that I cook eggs on toast for breakfast and plan meals that we can sit down and share as a family. They are the reason that we adopted a kitten who seems to think that 5 a.m. is an acceptable wake-up time. They are the reason that I take care of my body so that I can keep up to them, and so that I can model a healthy life. They are the reason that I make their Dad drive to the lake on our way to dinner so that I can be with them in a photo more than once a year.

They push me and they pull me and they make me wonder if I’m cut out for this. They love me and they make me laugh and they make me think that I might be doing something right. They are the flesh of my flesh and the bone of my bones and I would not be the woman I am today if they were not by my side.

I still can’t believe that I get to be their Mom.

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Family me

May 9, 2013

Pump Up The Volume

When we first got married, I would drive my new husband crazy with my morning-person tendencies. He’s a night owl who likes his sleep and mornings are not his ‘thing.’ I would hop out of bed ready to talk (and talk and talk) and he needed at least an hour before he could process what I said, never mind replying to anything. Thanks to good communication, I learned that Talking = BAD, and it had nothing to do with me. I would still do it — I am what I am — and it got to be something we’d laugh about because WHO TALKS SO MUCH AT 6:30 AM?

(I do.)

Fast forward thirteen years and we have three children who wake up before we do, make themselves breakfast, and are REALLY LOUD while doing so. There are slamming cupboards (Graham) and there is hysterical laughter (Emily) and there is slurping of the cereal milk (Nathan). When we make our way downstairs, we are bombarded with random stories (Graham) and questions about the day (Emily) and demands to have sunblock applied the moment we enter the kitchen (Nathan). They are all HAPPY TO BE AWAKE and SPEAK IN THEIR OUTSIDE VOICES and DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW LOUD THEY ARE.

(If I could harness their superpower to go from sleeping to TALKING LOUDLY AND RUNNING EVERYWHERE in 1.6 seconds, I so would. I’d also sell it to the highest bidder.)

I may be a morning person, but I keep my volume at an acceptable level. Matthew might disagree, but it’s a much lower level than the kids use. I’ve become that stereotypical Mom who says, ‘Please don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee.” And then I laugh, because I only drink a small cup of coffee each morning and I think I’m just using it as an excuse to get them to lower the volume.

I should add that Sir Nathan is the worst offender, all day long. He seems to have lost his inside voice along the way and we miss it so. Every thing that he says is AT TOP VOLUME. The most annoying/hilarious use of his REALLY LOUD VOICE (Irony: My slightest child is the LOUDEST) is when he tries to get my attention to tell me something.

MOM!!

I reply as an adult should.

NATHAN!!

And then we laugh, because he knows why I do it. And yet he never scales the volume back. Never ever.

As for Emily, can I just ask for prayers before we get to the teenage years? There is stomping, there is door slamming, there is throwing herself on the couch in a fury. All while yelling. About how I’M NOT YELLING. I will turn away and giggle, because YELLING ABOUT HOW YOU’RE NOT YELLING is pretty dang funny.

This post is sponsored by the bedtime routine which contained kids yelling about how YES, I BRUSHED MY TEETH (Graham) and I NEED MY WATER BOTTLE (Emily) and LOOK AT ME SHAKING MY BOOTY ON THE STAIRS (Nathan).

I think that I’ve used my allotment of ALL CAPS for the rest of the year, but it was a necessary evil. Welcome to my (VERY LOUD) life.

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Family Parenting

May 8, 2013

10 Reasons Why You Need To Attend Mom 2.0

I attended the Mom 2.0 Summit this past weekend and I now know why all of my friends were all, YOU NEED TO COME and IT IS SO AMAZING. Because I think that amazing is the best word to describe my time at the conference. I was surrounded by brilliant women (many of whom are friends — I have the best friends), I attended session that saw me shouting YES (Internally) and, well, the views were okay.

(Do you see the wee red dot that is the sun?)

There are so many things that I took away from this weekend, but I’ll share the ten biggest ones.

1. You are with your people. You write your feelings on the Internet, which may be foreign to people in your social circles at home. At Mom 2.0 you can be as geeky as you want to be.

2. You get face time. I have made many connections via the Internet, but the majority of the strongest ones are with those whom I’ve shared a meal/room/post-midnight snack with.

3. You hear from gifted people. Sitting and listening to words and wisdom spoken vocally is ten times louder than reading it online.

4. You learn new things. We are in a new frontier, which is an ever-evolving space. Sometimes it can feel like you’re treading water. Listening to those who are clipping along and sharing how you can get afloat and get your motor running (head out on the highway) gives you new direction.

5. Have I mentioned the view?

6. You get hours and hours with your closest crew, who sat with you in sessions and lounged with you by the pool and were there to find you when you got lost in the massive hotel. Man, I miss them.

7. You make new connections and strengthen other connections. You may not take photos of every person — because you’re busy connecting — but just because there isn’t a photo doesn’t mean that it didn’t happen.

8. The photos you do take of the people you spent time with bring you no end of joy.

(That center one was staged in response to the WSJ article about Mom bloggers going to conferences in order to escape their families and drink from the mini bar.)(I can’t stop laughing at it.)

9. It’s big enough to meet new people and small enough to connect with your usual people by simply walking through the hotel lobby.

10. You might win something amazing that makes you feel extra special. You might also decide to keep it, because even those of us who live in the buttpoke of nowhere deserve to have something fancy. You might fret about when you will actually use it in a town of 10,000, but know that even if you use it once in a special blue moon, it’s worth it. You are worth it.

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May 6, 2013

The Devil Wears Prada

I arrived home from the Mom 2.0 Summit just in time for (a quick nap, and) dinner last night. I plan to write about what I gleaned from it when I have time to both decompress and sit down and do it justice. So far today I’ve brought the kids to school, ran 10K, and done a huge grocery shop to replenish our fridge and cupboards. In an hour I have to leave to pick up those same kids, take them shoe shopping, then make dinner, pack school lunches, etcetera. But there is a part of the weekend that has been a hot topic both with attendees and people here at home and I think it deserves its own post.

Those of you who have been to conferences know that there are always sponsor booths. Sponsors pay to be there, which means that us attendees get to stay at fancy hotels with breathtaking views for far less than we would normally pay.

Hooray for sponsors!

To encourage the attendees to talk to all of the sponsors, we we given a card with all of the main sponsors on it. After talking to a sponsor, they would stamp their spot. When all of the sponsors had been stamped, you handed in your card to be part of a draw on the final night for a grand prize of a Prada bag. I KNOW.

I never win anything huge. Okay, I did win a Wii Fit at BlogHer ’09, but that was four years ago. There were 550 attendees at Mom 2.0, so the odds weren’t that great. That aside, we made our way to all of the sponsor booths because, why not? They were sponsors whom we liked and use, or will likely use in the future. Blurb was there, and I’ve worked with them a few times. Dove was the main sponsor and I love their Girls Unstoppable campaign. When Rob Candelino showed the videos with the stats about how women and girls view themselves, I was in a constant state of tearful emotion.

We made our way to all of the sponsors (Who doesn’t like Starbucks, either?) and handed in our cards when they were full of stamps. Fast forward to the final party — with a Kentucky Derby theme — and we were standing at the back of the room chatting while Laura and Carrie thanked everyone and prepared for the draw. All of a sudden, they announced who won the Prada bag.

ANGELLA DYKSTRA!

You guys, I won a $2,000 PRADA BAG. I guess all of the times I haven’t won things has added up? Or something? I had people asking to touch it all night and I don’t blame them. Because, PRADA.

I still don’t believe that I won. I sent that photo to all of the Internet places, and texted Matthew. He was as excited as everyone else, because even he knows how cool that is.

When I got home, we were talking about it as part of the general debriefing and he asked if I was going to sell it. Sarah had asked me the same thing, and I said no, because PRADA. But where would I actually use it? I live in the sticks, I work from home, and aside from conferences, I don’t go to fancy parties on a regular basis. He pointed out that I could sell it and use that money to buy WHATEVER I WANT. Not to spend on bills or household expenses, but to spend it on myself.

I … don’t know. Part of me thinks that’s probably the practical thing to do, but the other part of me is a small town girl who thinks that it’s pretty special that she won a fancy purse. In the meantime, I’m going to leave it sitting on my dresser and smile every time I look at it. Winning it has had me beaming for days.

*Our church secretary commented on Facebook that the devil wears Prada, so I might not want to bring it to church. Ha!

**She also told me in person today that I deserve it, and than men just don’t understand.

***It’s really pretty in person. And I WON IT, against the odds.

****But maybe I should be practical. Sigh.

*****I’m going to stop typing now.

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mom2.0

May 2, 2013

Nice To Meet You

I’m on my way to Laguna Niguel to attend the Mom 2.0 Summit for my very first time, courtesy of my lovely bosses at Work It! Mom. I will be spending the weekend with old friends, making new friends, and learning what I can to be a better writer/blogger/business person. As I’ll be handing out my business cards to people who ask — and who have likely never heard of me — I thought it best to write a post about, well, me. I have an About Me page that’s mostly up to date but it doesn’t include everything about me. Nor will this post, but it may shine some light on my personality and it may include information that some of you regular readers don’t know.

My name is Angella, with two l’s. The correct pronunciation is An-GEL-la (Think “Ella” with an “Ang” placed in front)(I’ve always worried that it sounds pretentious, so I usually pronounce it the usual way). Ange is reserved for friends and if you call me Angie, you get only one warning. A second offense is not recommended, for your own safety.

I apparently talk with my hands. I say, “apparently” because I don’t even know that I’m doing it. There are, however, many knocked-over drinks and one fried laptop that make me think that there may be substance to this theory.

I am an introverted extrovert. What does this mean? It means that if I am in a large crowd of people I know I will talk and talk (and talk and talk)(while “apparently” waving my hands) for hours and hours (and hours and hours). I then need to balance all of that ‘on’ time with alone/hanging out with a few good friends time. I can ‘act’ outgoing in situations such as a new conference, but I can tell you that it requires a lot of deep breathing before leaving my room. And also, a cute ‘confidence’ outfit.

I prefer appetizers over chocolate, wine over beer and Craig Ferguson over Rick Mercer. (That last one is pretty much a draw, and I know that it is my civic duty to root for the Canadian, but I do love Craig so.)

I laugh quickly and loudly. I am easily amused, yes, but I also appreciate good humor.

I am a pretty active person. I run a minimum of 22K per week, with one of those runs being 10K in distance. I started running races two years ago and last year completed three 10K races. I plan to do those races again this year (all three of them) and run my first half marathon in September, so I will start upping my mileage soon. I attend a strength boot camp two other days a week and ski/hike/work out one other day a week. On the seventh day, I rest.

I still feel like the high school me with acid-washed jeans, bangs the same length as my face and navy glasses with frames so big they reached my eyebrows and with lenses so thick you could start a fire in mere seconds. You think I’m kidding? I am so not.

I think that raisins should be abolished from Earth because, gag.

I am an accountant (Yes, really) half of the time and a writer/photographer (Yes, really) the other half of the time. There are some days where both sides of my brain hurts, is what I’m saying.

I have never eaten at In-N-Out Burger, but plan to remedy that on Thursday. A good friend from college is picking me up from the airport and taking me there for lunch so that this great injustice will be rectified.

California is my Happy Place, and I am beyond excited to spend three nights in a hotel overlooking the ocean.

I am outgoing but shy, flawed but authentic, excited but nervous. Say hi if you see me, if you could.