I don’t seem to talk about my husband in this here space very often. It’s not that there is anything wrong, not at all. Everything is so very, very right.
It’s been almost three years since my friend Kristin told me that I should be paid to write. She thought that I would be a good fit with Work It! Mom and suggested I write about relationships because, and I quote, “You have the happiest marriage on the Internet.” I’m not sure if that is entirely true, but if anything it stands as a testament to the fact that I would often talk about my relationship with my husband and kind of gush about him. And us. And how happy we were (are) together. Ever since starting to write a relationship column, I tend to save our stories for over there because, well, have you ever tried to write about relationships twice a week? I tend to save all of the fodder I can muster to share with those that like to read about relationships.
The thing is, my husband deserves to be gushed about more than two times a week and he most definitely needs to be gushed about here, in my space, because he is a large part of my life and of who I am. Some people may get their back up about the “of who I am” statement but it’s true. I am bonded to this man, and we have committed to making it to forever, and I bounce all of my thoughts and ideas off of him (and he does the same to me) and so, yeah. We are two people but we are also one. It’s kind of neat.
Sometimes I feel like I walk a fine line with people when it comes to talking about my marriage. I will find myself in a group of women who are sharing a camaraderie about husbands who cannot cook and who do not change diapers and who think that there is a “fairy” who does the laundry and gets groceries and makes dinner. I…cannot relate. But to speak up and say so might come across as being a bit of a douche canoe. So I just smile and nod. Usually.
The thing is, I am married to a man who hates dirty floors so much that I have washed said floors…three times? Maybe four? In (almost) eleven years of marriage. I am the one who meal plans and buys groceries, because I like to do so (and he HATES it), but he cooks dinner Monday through Friday and I arrive home to said dinner on the table, sometimes accompanied by a glass of wine. He does all of the baking that we keep in the house (cookies and granola bars and muffins, oh my!). He does all of the “traditional” jobs (See: lawn mowing and snow plowing taking out the garbage). He also does about 80% of our laundry in addition to taking the garbage out and dealing with our two dogs and MAN, I am so not making this up. It gets better (or worse, if you are married to someone who believes in “fairies”).
(Would this be a good time to mention that he is working at the church thirty hours a week? No? Carry on.)
Back when we were in the baby stage, we shared diaper duty and onesie-wrangling duty and he would take one feeding a night so I could get a longer stretch of sleep when the newborn babies were trying to kill me up every two hours. He has been a hands-on Dad from the minute we became parents and it only made me love him more that I already do.
Does he have flaws? Oh, sure. He doesn’t cut his toenails as often as I’d like and he will mumble instead of speaking clearly and he has an affinity for doing things “later” and let’s not talk about his morning breath.
Fine, that’s not so much a flaw as a genetics issue. Or something.
I am married to a man who loves me and who supports me and who gets me. He also cracks me up all of the time (and I, him) and that really is what it’s all about, I think. Spending your life with someone who loves you and gets you and shares your faith and morals and beliefs and who can fire a zinger that makes you hang your head because you are laughing so hard.
(Case in point: I finally got a wireless remote, and figured it out, then said, “I know how to work it!” Him: “I know how to work it, too.)
He’s my favorite. Especially because when I ask him to pose for a photo with me for the first time in six months and he starts with this:
I love him.
I am right there with you on keeping my mouth shut when I’m around women who are complaining about their husbands. Troy is AWESOME and I tell him so all the time. So when I’m out with friends who are having a bitch-about-our-men session I tend to just keep my mouth shut and silently thank God for my husband.
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You know, I’ve been on both sides of this scenario.
And we all know, I’ve complained about my marriage at times and our separation was well documented. But none of our problems have ever stemmed from him not pulling his share around the house. And like your fabulous hubby, mine pulls more than his share if we broke it all down.
Since my blog so covered our bad times, I try to make sure I sing his praises now that things are in such a better place.
Having a husband who is the other half of yourself is a blessing. We are very fortunate women.
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You are blessed with your perfect match.
Awesome that he does so much around the house.
Also, “douche canoe”? Never heard that one before but it’s awesome.
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I love this post. I feel the same way about my husband! Cheers to good husbands!
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I feel the exact same way about my husband and he does just about all the same things (I haven’t done laundry since I was pregnant with MAD!). In fact, I have a similar post up right now because I’m so tired of media and society pushing this idea that men are 1) idiots 2) not doing their part with housework/kids. Mark has some annoying habits (the man cannot close a cupboard or screw on a lid to save his life) but on the whole he’s amazing… a perfect partner in this crazy life.
One of my commenters said this and I think it’s so true: “Marriage and family isn’t 50/50. It’s 100/100. You’ve got to be all in. ” Amen!
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Go, Matt!! You guys set the bar for the rest of us.
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I love this. I love ALL of this. One day I’ll find Mr. Awesome and I can only hope we are as crazy about each other and as good for each other as you two are. *crosses fingers.
xox
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Maybe there would be more happy marriages if more husbands did all that.
That was a joke.
Sort of.
You guys are the best! Way to set a good example for the rest of us. Woot!
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Love this
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Aww, you guys are so cute!
My hubby is the same with the housework and cooking and stuff. Only mine does the shopping more often than me, but does NOT bake. That works okay though because I LOVE to bake!
You are blessed indeed!
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He sure is a keeper! And shows so in the photo!!!
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“He doesn’t cut his toenails as often as I’d like and he will mumble instead of speaking clearly and he has an affinity for doing things “later” and let’s not talk about his morning breath.” … Noah and Matthew could be brothers. Twins, even, because that is EXACTLY him.
Since we moved to Saskatoon (read: since I got pregnant), Noah does EVERYTHING. I usually plan the meals and I sometimes cook (because I like to), but he’s done the laundry, the dishes, the vacuuming, some baking here and there, and about half the cooking. He also takes out the garbage and shovels the driveway. Most nights I get home and sit on the couch and do not get off of it (besides to use the washroom) until I go to bed. He does dinner, bathes Liliana, runs Kaylie a shower, and puts both girls to bed. I’ve got it made.
Obviously things will change when I’m the one home all day and he’s the one working (although he *just* started working again), and I’ll try to take on most everything, but I’ve been pretty thankful for him for the last eight months.
I love happy marriage posts! (Although I definitely avoided them for a good while and can completely understand the other side too.)
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I have a pretty great husband, but you hit the JACKPOT with the floor washing thing!
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how very sweet. i’m sure he appreciates your sentiments on YOUR space.
i am right there with you in being rather lucky to have my husband. he does all that stuff too. well, he used to cook, but now i stay home, so… you know. however, he does the dishes because i cook. (oh and not to one up you, but i have washed the floor….. zero times).
The Mr. used to bear the moniker “Best Husband of Bunko”…. but of course – i didn’t tell my Bunko friends that.
it’s those times when i would hear my friends bch about their husbands that i just sunk into how very LUCKY i was.
er, AM.
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Y’all do have an awesome relationship. At least from my perspective., here on my sofa!
I’ve been thinking about writing about my man lately too. Our men certainly deserve some credit. Mine is an awesome help too, even with how hard he words outside the home.
Love that silly pic face! He’s such a good sport!
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#TeamMatthew
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Your marriage posts just make me so happy. I love a delightful marriage.
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