I have believed in God for as long as I can remember.
I was not born into a “Christian” home, but always knew God to be real. Always. This is something that I have never doubted. Ever. I was told a few years ago by a very wise man that this was a “gift”. Many people wrestle with their belief and for me to not have that struggle means that I have been given something that many people long to have.
I remember attending Sunday School with my friend Ruth in Second Grade. The church was only a few blocks from my house and my Mom let me go with my good friend (who happened to be the Pastor’s daughter). I loved to hear the Bible stories, to see them played out on the felt boards, to make crafts to bring home. I was a shy child, however, and when I learned that I would have to have a new teacher that following September I chose to stop going. I was too scared to meet someone new.
This had nothing to do with God; I still believed in Him. I was just too introverted to meet a new teacher, a new felt master.
The summer after eighth grade was spent in the home of my Dad and Stepmom. They had become Christians a few years before, and when we went to visit we always attended church with them. Seeing as how I had this belief in the Big Guy, church attendance was not a problem for me. I was just hanging out in God’s house. It was all fine and good.
One day my Stepmom had me help her memorize some Bible verses. There was this moment where she explained to me how Jesus fit into this picture of God that I had. She told me who Jesus was, who He is. It all made complete and perfect sense to me. I was still shy, and introverted, so I waited until I was alone in my room that night. I got onto my knees for the first time in my life and actually talked to this God that I knew to be real. I finally got the whole picture.
God. Jesus. Faith. Eternity.
Before I knew it I was enrolled in a Christian school and attending a Youth Group. I learned the culture of Christianity in North America. Christians did not swear, did not drink, did not smoke, did not do drugs, did not listen to “bad music”. There was a whole list of things that we did not do. That somehow set us apart.
After high school I attended Bible College. While those two years were absolutely phenomenal in the truths that I learned, and in the lifelong friendships that I made, they were also a continuation of the learning of the Christian Culture. You wore skirts on Sundays, you did not watch movies, you shared a hall telephone with thirty other girls. I was wrapped in this bubble that, while amazing while in it, left me culture shocked upon returning to the Real World.
After two years of college I found myself in the big city of Vancouver. I bristled against the Rules and Regulations that were this faith that I knew. There seemed to be no Joy. Only guilt, judgment, condemnation. I still believed in God, and in Jesus, but they did not seem to mesh with this list of Rules that I was supposed to live by. I went my own way for awhile.
But I was missing something. Someone.
I started attending church again. I got to know the God of my youth. The Loving God. The Happy God. The God who wanted to be my Best Friend.
The God who was nothing like the Christian “culture” had made Him out to be.
I met a boy who knew this same God. We married, bought a house, had babies. We have built a life based on a common faith, a shared love and belief in this God of Love. We have not settled in our faith, however. We have realized that the faith of our youth is one heavy on religion. We also believe that God hates religion. This is why Jesus turned over tables in the Temple.
The more I read of the Bible, the more I read books of people who have searched this Bible, who have dug into the Greek and the Hebrew, the more I realize that so many people have got it wrong. Myself included.
In an effort to help people to live a “good” life, The Church, and Her People, have put out this list of “Don’ts”
Don’t swear. Don’t drink. Don’t dance. Don’t (fill in the blank).
But what do Christians DO? This is the question.
They need to love as God loves. As Jesus loves.
The Christian “culture” (a large chunk of it, at least) has dropped the ball on this. In the attempt to portray God’s love, it has set out this list of Rules. A list of Don’ts. A religion. The Love has often been removed.
I have been just as guilty of this as anyone. But I want it to be different.
In the past few months our Home Group has been working through The Truth Project. In the first week two questions were thrown out that struck me as absolutely perfect for where I am in my faith right now.
Do you really believe that what you believe is really real?
Yes, I do. The more I search/study/read, the more my inherent beliefs are confirmed.
If your answer is yes, then how are you living your life any differently?
This question sums up what I have been wrestling with for the past year or so. Am I any different because of what I believe? When people meet me, do they see grace, love, compassion…and other virtues that I want to exude?
I know that I have failed, sometimes quite miserably. I also know that faith is a journey and not a destination. You can bet that I will continue to stumble as I walk down the path, but at least I am moving in the right direction.
Wow – this really sums up my own feelings about God and religion very well. I grew up very active in my church but lost religion somewhere along the way (around the time I was told that as I young woman I couldn’t do things that men could do in the church). I do believe in God – a graceful, loving, compassionate being full of mercy and forgiveness and I try to act accordingly. I do NOT believe in the rules thrown down by churches/religion/people. Unfortunately, the term “Christian” today implies you believe the latter not the former which is a sad thing.
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I love this. I totally get it. I grew up in a VERY religious church and I hated it. I hated going. When I finally discovered FAITH, I got it. I’m not a fan of the “Christian” culture at all – I grew up in it – and it was all judgmental and crap. Something I DO NOT want for my children.
Thank you for putting this into words Angella, I think you do a great job at emulating what a true Christ-follower (I’m starting to hate the word “Christian”) looks like.
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Beautiful post. Recently, I had a teacher say “Jesus did not fulfill religion, he destroyed it”. I agree that the Christian culture more times than not puts Christians in a poor light. I think you have the right idea that as Christians our focus should be on what we do and why we do it instead of what we are not allowed to do and the judgement that follows.
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Summed up pretty well IMO. Thanks.
What you have truly is a gift…the undeniable belief…it is something I struggle with. As a youth I was able to lay down many of the “rules” for the love and grace, as an adult I have problems laying down all of the rules…its a struggle between “accountability” and “love your neighbor” But, I figure if I am on a journey of seeking God/Jesus/Holy Spirit and during that, attempt to love those around me and leave as many of the judgements to other people…it’ll all work out.
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You’ve sure got it Angella, and thanks for putting it so well. What matters for me is not a religion based on Jesus but a rich, meaningful and liberating relationship with the awesome God Jesus knew and showed so well. Bonhoeffer put all this so poignantly during WW2 Germany – “religionless Christianity”. But he also realised we need community if not religion. Great that your group is working on this.
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Girl.
That was great. And, exactly. And, I KNOW. And, wow.
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Apparently you were able to put into words what a lot of us were thinking/feeling. Your words pretty much echo my sentiment. I shadow a lot of what you have said about your youth, the list of don’ts – it was beyond intimidating and I certainly don’t think that beliefs should be brought on or supported by intimidation. What matters most to me is the example I set, and although I most certainly fumble (I am human after all), I am happy with who I am.
Thank you so much for sharing, it is probably one of my favourite posts since I have been reading.
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First of all, I love you. For being someone who is honest in her struggles and by being honest makes someone like me, who neglects her faith regularly feel normal. I am not the only one who bristles at organized religion. The rules and regulations and judgment that accompany it go against everything I believe to be true about God, Jesus and this thing called Christianity. These are what make me neglect the formal side of faith, the going to church part. My faith is always part of me, it just sometimes take a back burner to life.
Thank you for putting into words what I feel daily. Thank you.
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I wish I could show this post to my little sister. She is living a life of Don’ts and it is one of the reasons we’re not close.
Great post, Angella.
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So well said. Thank you for sharing! I had a period in my life where I just let loose and went crazy, because I couldn’t handle all the “don’ts” and rules. I don’t do well with restrictions like that.
Thankfully I’ve found a good church that is focused on the things you’ve mentioned, and is more about LOVE and really knowing and living out your faith. The things that matter. It’s awesome.
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Thanks for the great reminder to “do” not “don’t”! I’m with you, girl!
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I totally understand. Thank you for this post.
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This was a great post. If more Christians would focus on the loving and kindness and Jesus-centered things of Christianity, instead of all the supposed rules and regulations, we’d be setting a better example, that’s for sure.
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that was lovely.
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Yay! You posted the religion post—I’ve been waiting with excitement to read your thoughts.
I totally and completely get what you are saying, in fact I am still struggling with and working through my salvation. What does it mean to be a follower of Christ? How can I, a sinner, live in a fallen world, while still glorifying God?
The Truth Project is AWESOME! It really revolutionized things for me. Thanks for giving us a glimpse into your heart; I am better for it.
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New to your blog and this was the first post I read. BRILLIANT.
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Great post, Angella! My pastor is doing a series right now that reminds me of some of the points you made. Sunday, he said something that stuck with me: “It’s not what you believe that matters, it’s what you believe enough to do!” His blog is withoutwax.tv and it’s worth checking out.
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Great article. I agree with you wholeheartedly about God despising religion. Sounds like you have an extremely healthy mindset about things. Congrats to you and yours on not having to struggle w/the Is or Isn’t
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What an excellent and honest post! Thank you for sharing some of your personal beliefs, and struggles too. You seem to be in an authentically comfortable spot with your faith, and also willing to be open to learning more and growing within yourself. How special. Thanks, again.
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Fantastic post, Angella. You have hit the nail on the head, completely. The fact that so many commenters have said the same thing proves that this is how a lot of us feel, but haven’t been able to express.
I am SO grateful that I did not grow up in an overly “religious” church. I would hate to think where I would be in my journey right now if I had. The reason many non-Christians are so put off by the thought of being “born again” is the example they see out there, the strict rules and regulations that characterise so many Christians and so many churches. We MUST get back to the message, the one of LOVE. God loves you, and so do I. That’s the one that will win people for Him!
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I’m reading through these comments, and I feel very much on the outside here. I was born into a Catholic family, but I chose to confirm my faith later in life after much reading and exploring different faiths and communities — so I completely understand what it is to search for faith, meaning, and a practice that feels right.
That said, I am truly puzzled by the “God hates religion” line, and that people have “got it all wrong.” Isn’t that what makes us human, finding faith and worship that suits us individually? And who are we to judge someone else’s interpretation?
I’m Catholic, the faith that was founded at the feet of St. Peter — and it is Jesus Himself who said in regards to Peter, “…upon this rock, I will build my Church…” I’m pretty sure that God doesn’t hate all 1.1 billion Catholics worldwide because they practice an organized religion. And in my experience, this has been a religion of love, charity, selflessness, one that honors Jesus both as a Jew and as of the Son of God. I’m sure many people would disagree with me, but that’s just my own experience in the modern Catholic faith.
So does God hate religion, or religious fanatics? So there is a right and wrong way to worship? I guess that’s what I took away from your post. My apologies if I have interpreted incorrectly.
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Marci,
I am not saying there is a right and wrong way to worship. People often get caught up in the rote and religion, as opposed to just acting like Jesus did. He turned over the tables in the Temple because the Pharisees had turned sacrifices into a money-making scheme and had taken all of the love out of the faith.
I find it kind of cool that you quoted that verse about Peter being the rock, as our pastor preached on it a few weeks ago. If you go into the original language, Jesus was not referring to Peter himself, but his faith in Jesus.
“In Matthew 16:18, the word “rock” refers to Peter’s confession of faith, and not to Peter himself, despite the fact that Peter/rock is a play on the word for rock in Aramaic [petros] and Greek [petra]. As we read in 1 Corinthians 10:4, “…they drank of that spiritual Rock that followed them, and that Rock was Christ,” Who alone is the very foundation, or true Rock, upon which stands the Church. It is on Jesus Christ, the Rock, that the Church’s unchanging faith and confession is firmly rooted.”
This is not to knock Catholics or “organized religion”, as my church falls into that category. Many people who attend these churches (Like you and I) have our faith figured out. Many others, however, thing that if they do certain rituals or take specific steps, then that is what it is all about.
If you read the New Testament, however, the people who were blazing a trail for The Way were not about following a certain set of “rules” to get to heaven. They were about loving others like God does
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Give this a listen.
http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=67504212017&h=sf2Fk&u=uyoAN&ref=mf
It’s Mark Driscol on “Why I hate religion”
Right on track and may help LVGurl.
Tough questions though LVGurl. Worth a good ponder.
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I always love that–despite the differences in our faiths–whenever you write about yours, I see totally eye-to-eye with your sentiments. Loved this post, Angella. xoxo
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I can’t even tell you how much I love this post.
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So well said. My husband and I have struggled with the religion vs. faith thing our entire marriage…and have just recently found a church. But what a church it is! And I’m so glad we’ve remained strong in our faith on the journey to find it. I’m now in much the same place as you…making a conscious effort to live in a Christ-like way each day. It’s a decision each day, and each day I fail some. But I have to believe God is pleased with the trying!
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I don’t really know where to start with this, as I generally try to stay away from religious topics so that I don’t offend people, but I will say this. I think that what you are doing is a very a respectable, honorable, albeit difficult track. I wish you well.
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I’m so glad you are thinking about this, because SO MANY people do not.
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Just found this thru Worthington Wire. This post is perfect, I wish I had written it. It pretty much exactly explains the way I am trying to live life as a follower of Christ. Thank you for writing it!
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Great post Angella. I read it the other day but, did not have time to comment., sorry for that.
Religion is such a personal subject and one that so many people struggle with. It is wonderful to see someone who not only grew up with it, but struggled with it and came through on the other side. Something that I too have grown up with. My father is a Pastor and it was like I didn’t have a choice but to follow along. Somewhere along that road, I made my own decisions and choices and here I am today. Not saying that I am a perfect Christian, but I am a Christian and I try to behave like one as best that I can.
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So very well said. I agree.
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FANTASTIC!!! So rarely see the specifics of one’s faith spelled out on a blog. Great job and I’m encouraged by your faith. As hard as it is for two adults to figure out their beliefs its even harder to know how to pass them on to their children.
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