My Friday morning Mom’s group started up again this past Friday. The book that was chosen is titled “Managing Your Moods“. I must confess that when I first heard the title of the book my mood may have been a little, well, poor. It figured that a book for a bunch of women would be about moods. Typical.
I have to (sheepishly) admit that the book is quite good, based on the first chapter. A quote that stuck out for me is the following:
Whether we realize it or not, we are being defined by the emotion we display most consistently.
That quote has been ringing in my ears ever since. It does not mean that it is bad to feel a wide array of emotions; it just means that you want to think about what emotions you are displaying on a continual basis. For example. If I am having a bad day and step on a small piece of Lego, there is no need to throw it in the general direction of the toy box with all of my might. Not that I do that or anything.
I would like to be known as someone who is happy, content, loving, patient…but I often fail miserably. While I am on my best behavior when out in public, my immediate family unfortunately gets to see my vast array of emotions. I was starting to think I had a long way to go until I observed my daughter on Saturday.
She is almost two and has absolutely no concept of keeping her moods is check. She will be funny and quirky one minute and then be writhing on the floor and screaming the next.
That exact scenario happened on Saturday while we were at Wal*Mart. I did something unreasonable like tell her she could not have candy or something and she flung herself to the ground in a fit of fury. I turned around and walked away. I looked back to see if she was coming after me. She was on all fours, face wet with tears, yelling, “MOM! ME! MOM! ME!”
A random lady walked past me and said, “Well. Somebody sure has a temper”.
You think?
Also. What makes you think that comment was going to make me feel better about the situation?
I could have said something but I just bit my tongue and smiled. No sense in creating a ruckus over something that was, well, true.
I simply picked up my girl and told her that she had made Mommy sad when she yelled at (and hit!) me. She squeezed me tight around the neck and said, “Sorry Mommy”. Two minutes later she was flirting with the old man in the line-up.
I have to admit that I truly love the wide array of moods that Emily shows. She is a passionate, dynamic little girl. She will be quiet and contemplative at times.
If she is sad she cannot hide it.
She wanted to hold Kitty (Our cat. We also have a fish named Big Fish and a chicken named Mr. Chicken. We keep it simple around here) but Kitty ran under the van just out of reach. It was a very tragic event.
I distracted her with Bocci ball and next thing you know she is back to her quirky self.
I even managed to catch her smiling.
While this girl may be feisty at times, she is also one of the most loving and hilarious children I know. I want to state for the record that I will take her huge personality over that of a placid child any day. This will likely bite me in the backside when she is a teenager, but for now I am honestly loving it.
Watching her complete and utter inability to conceal her emotions showed me that while I have my weak moments, I have come a long way from the unbridled emotions of my childhood. You can dress me up and take me out and I won’t throw my food on the floor if I don’t like it. I promise.
While I may feel so many conflicting emotions in a day, I want to come across as a woman who is full of laughter and love because that is who I feel I truly am at the core of my being. What do you want the emotions you portray to say about you?
18 Comments
Great reminder for my week! I’ve been reminded (ok, hit over the head with) that I need to keep attitude in check. It’s hard, but doable! And those “little comments” that strangers feel they need to share are the hardest to let roll right past! Good job for doing what Miss Emily needed to see from you!
Kate’s last blog post..Must…Stay…Positive
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Comment by Kate on September 14th, 2008 @ 1:18 pmTyler is just like Emily, NO concept of keeping his emotions in check. And like you, I treasure the fact that it makes Tyler the amazing child he is. He is larger than life, and I LOVE that.
Your post was a great reminder though about the emotions that we consistently show. We ALL have moments of anger, impatience and general ugliness … but at long as happiness, laughter, fun and kindness abound MOST of the time, I think we’ve got it right. No way should emotions be bottled up inside, only to explode in a most horrible way when nobody expects it. It’s right & good to feel an array of emotions, but even better to feel that the emotions people see the most really DO portray the you that you want to be.
Awesome reminder!
Hannah’s last blog post..I’m a Crafty Tart!
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Comment by Hannah on September 14th, 2008 @ 2:05 pmThe biggest thing I think I’ve learned about emotions, and that I try to keep in mind is, feelings are not facts. I might feel something now and it seems like it will be that way forever, but it won’t. Feelings are changeable.
bethany actually’s last blog post..Marching to her own beat
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Comment by bethany actually on September 14th, 2008 @ 3:06 pmI can so relate to this post. My girls are 3.5, 2,2,& 2, so as you can imagine we see lots of high drama around here… and they really feed off of each other. We have a new rule that if you must cry and you are not hurt (bleeding) then you should do so in your own room. Fortunately, the giggling is also contagious! What a great age!! I’ll definitely be thinking throughout the week about what my emotions are saying about me, too. Thanks for sharing the quote.
MaryBeth’s last blog post..The Last Family Photo for a While…
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Comment by MaryBeth on September 14th, 2008 @ 4:26 pmWe did this book in women’s group a few years ago and I truly enjoyed it. I don’t remember if it was from this book or another that we did around the same time but I really learned that I needed to “Respond to situations, not react to them” This has really helped me keep my emotions in check a bit better.
Heather’s last blog post..French Lick sounds kinda dirty
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Comment by Heather on September 14th, 2008 @ 4:28 pmI had to laugh out loud several times in the post… that’s what I love about you, even with such a serious topic, you poke fun and make us laugh.
*Snicker* about the lego and the throwing food… you and me? SO MUCH ALIKE. Okay, okay, so sometimes I still forget and throw food on the floor…I am a work in progress 
I love this post, I, too, can let my emotions get the best of me. Thanks for the reminder!
Kami’s last blog post..10 for 10
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Comment by Kami on September 14th, 2008 @ 6:22 pmI read the same “feelings are not facts” in a book I’m reading right now. It’s so true.
I have the same thing as you – everyone outside my house gets a bubbly happy person, but everyone inside my house gets a mean, grumpy, moody lady who will either scream at you or hug you, you never know.
I’ve never thought of the emotions of children as that raw before. But you’re totally right. Liliana will also be happy one minute and tantruming the next. Babies are fun.
Mrs. Wilson’s last blog post..Farewell Queen I Jinns Join
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Comment by Mrs. Wilson on September 14th, 2008 @ 6:51 pm“I would like to be known as someone who is happy, content, loving, patient…but I often fail miserably. ”
That pretty much sums it up for me. I want to be seen as loving and patient and Fun. a genuine guiding light for my kids. Sometimes when my son walks out of the room muttering under his breath and slams the door – I know where he got that. Every sunday thats what I pray for more than anything else – Patience with my kids.
monstergirlee’s last blog post..Inspired By A Red Barn
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Comment by monstergirlee on September 14th, 2008 @ 7:15 pmThese are my new favorites of Miss Emily. I even called my husband into see them!
The Over-Thinker’s last blog post..Wii are in Hell. Out of Shape, Hell.
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Comment by The Over-Thinker on September 14th, 2008 @ 8:05 pmI loved your second to last sentence – “While I may feel so many conflicting emotions in a day, I want to come across as a woman who is full of laughter and love because that is who I feel I truly am at the core of my being.”
That is exactly how I feel as well. Laughter and love play a huge part of my life, and I hope I reflect that as often as possible.
Sharon’s last blog post..Friday Love List – Wedding Edition!
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Comment by Sharon on September 14th, 2008 @ 8:51 pmOh! I could squish her little cheeks! Those sad pictures just break my heart, but are absolutely adorable! As for the moods? What a little monkey!!!
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Comment by Michele on September 14th, 2008 @ 9:41 pmoh, this is SOO me. like you, in public, i’ve got it down. i’m always smiling and you can’t ever tell if i’m in a bad mood. but behind closed doors, um, ahem, not so much. but…i’m trying!
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Comment by ali on September 15th, 2008 @ 9:02 amDear Wal Mart Lady,
WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR POINT?
Love,
Slynnro
slynnro’s last blog post..Scenes From A Marriage: He’s been listening? Ed.
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Comment by slynnro on September 15th, 2008 @ 12:20 pmoh.my.gosh. How could a heart NOT melt at that picture of Emily with those big, sad eyes, as she plays with her lip?
I just want to give her a big hug.
Beautiful. And full of life she is.
Karmyn’s last blog post..A post that should be An Open Letter to my Car, but I just can’t bring myself to look it in the eye right now
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Comment by Karmyn on September 15th, 2008 @ 1:13 pmI think in my career, I’d like to come across as confident and intelligent. I think I really come off as loud and pushy. Oops, sorry about that, coworkers!
Rhi’s last blog post..Cutting out shopping, AGAIN
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Comment by Rhi on September 15th, 2008 @ 2:16 pmI’m still trying to manage my moods, 30 years after I confounded my parents with my shrieking fits. I’m slowly figuring out where to find my brain’s off button.
Moose’s last blog post..Do or Do Not?There Is No Try
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Comment by Moose on September 18th, 2008 @ 4:34 pmLine and paragraph breaks automatic, e-mail address never displayed, HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>
Wow. I love that quote too. I think that it’s one that will pop back in my mind often. Thanks for sharing it.
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Comment by Jen on September 14th, 2008 @ 1:02 pm