I don’t remember how Rhi and I first found each others blogs, but I do know that I loved her biting humor from the beginning. We met for the first time in San Francisco during BlogHer ’08, but didn’t talk much. I thought that maybe she didn’t like me in person, but she told me afterward that she was shy! And nervous to talk to me! And then I explained what a huge dork I am and we’ve been golden ever since. It’s been fun to follow along Rhi’s story from a single girl in the big city of Portland, to meeting and falling in love with Bill, to hearing all of her ranting Tweets about all of the wedding planning issues she’s having the pleasure of dealing with. I can’t wait to hear about their wedding next month and to follow their story as they move to that next stage together. I also can’t wait to read what she’s decided to share here today.
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I’ve been really reluctant to make a life list. It’s not that there aren’t things that I’d like to accomplish in my lifetime, it’s just that EVERYONE IS DOING THAT and I’m just stubborn enough not to do something that everyone else is doing even if it’s something I actually kind of want to do. Neurotic? YES. And, besides, I made a list of things I wanted to accomplish before I turned 30 and I pretty much slacked on that.
So, a few weeks ago, Bill and I were talking about physical fitness and running and such (we are so boring) and we decided that something we’d like to do before we start our family is to run a half-marathon together. Which got me to thinking about other things that I’d like to do before we have a baby. So, I present with you my totally different than a life list, Things I’d Like to Do Before I Have a Baby List:
- Run a half-marathon with Bill (I know, we covered this, but the list looked short without it)
- Begin a Masters program (I started college at the wonderful University of Oregon, but a whole bunch of things prevented me from finishing my degree there. I’m happy with the school I graduated from, but I really, really want a diploma from UofO)
- Vacation, for at least a weekend, all by myself
- Also, have one awesome vacation with my girlfriends (we did this about 7 years ago when we were young and poor, I’d like to try it again now that we’re older and capable of saving money)
- Rid myself of all the toxic people in my life (I wrote about this a while ago and I’m ashamed to say, I’ve done nothing I set out to do)
- I guess now is a wonderful time to bring up that I’d like to learn to FOLLOW THROUGH on things, especially promises I make to myself
- Attempt, one more time, to learn to scuba dive (I tried to take a class once and had a horrible anxiety attack while sitting on the floor of a hotel pool, naturally, I spent the rest of the day at the hotel pool bar drinking)
- Learn to be less passive-aggressive and more honest
- Have a healthier relationship with my own mother
So, tell me…are there things you wanted to be sure you accomplished before you had children? Or, if you don’t have children, what do you want to accomplish before they arrive?








It took us a long time to have kids so by default we kind of accomplished the typical things you would put on a list. Now that I have kids, I’d say that (although it wasn’t planned) I’m glad that we were able to travel extensively, buy a house, and fully renovate the kitchen before any kids came along.
The passive-aggressive thing? I have that too. And actually I found that having my own kids has made me less willing to accept crap from others. I’m more willing to lay it out there because I don’t have to time to fart around with being nice all the time. I doubt I would be as forceful if I wasn’t already a mom.
.-= Marilyn (A Lot of Loves)´s last blog ..A Bucket of Water Will Buy an Hour of Quiet- Wednesday of Few Words =-.
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Did y’all pick a half marathon? Maybe the Waverlies should train together!
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I am the same way about not wanting to do something everyone else is doing. Neurotic twins.
Before I have a kid, I would like to travel with Mr. Darcy. We’ve got a list going on where we want to go (and not just on a honeymoon though we’re dreaming big and thinking about a 3 wk honeymoon in Europe). I want to be financially stable (knock on wood, almost there!). I want to drop 30 more lbs (so I can gain it back in pregnancy- ha ha).
.-= Sizzle´s last blog ..Family Ties =-.
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I don’t really think there was anything I wanted to get done before our girls arrived, they were my life list. I just thought it would be much further into life before I fell in love and had babies – apparently I was wrong.
.-= Ashley´s last blog ..Summer Giveaway thats something for free!- Starbucks Bliss =-.
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Um, get married. That would be #1!
.-= Kristabella´s last blog ..Poop In The Fridge! =-.
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I am still passive aggressive! And I’m married with kids!
But the thing is, even if you don’t accomplish all of these goals, you still can do it when you have kids. It’s more difficult but not impossible. And now all I can think of is having a vacation all to myself.
.-= kirida´s last blog ..Guest postess with the mostess =-.
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I have found that part of having a healthier relationship with my mother has come from becoming a mother myself.
.-= Danica´s last blog ..Shining Scars =-.
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Taylor Swift approves of this list.
Also: I have always wanted to learn to scuba dive! (It’s on my *whispers* list of things I want to do with this here life.) So if you ever need a scuba buddy, I’m totally game.
.-= Kerri Anne´s last blog ..Little Darling- It Seems Like Years Since It’s Been Here =-.
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Rhi, you ARE honest.
Love the list. My goal before I have babies is to be debt free (credit card and car, NOT student loan, because that’s never going to happen), oh, also…GET MARRIED. Although I have considered doing what J Lo did in her most recent flick.
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I’m learning to scuba dive! Well in the near(ish) future. Vahid got his license and I’ve always wanted to get mine. You, Kerri Anne, and I should all do it. (Not that I’m totally inviting myself along, even though i guess I kind of am, but in a nice way? Okay, end of comment.)
.-= Sarah´s last blog ..Things I Love 24 =-.
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Our only BIG before kids goal was to take a big vacation. Which we did – 3 weeks in Thailand – including scuba diving! (That was an afterthought when we started our research and found out how popular it was there) My husband made it through the training class ok – but had to take Adivan to make it through the dives in the big blue
(shh – don’t tell our guide!)
Otherwise I wanted to make it through the house and purge as much as possible. (I’m a pack rat!) I’ve made some progress but not nearly enough. Seeing as baby will be here any day and I have NO energy – this one won’t be completed. It’ll be a must before KID2 or else the kids will be sharing a bedroom – and we have a 4 bedroom house!
.-= Jilian´s last blog ..Curiosity – Cast your vote! =-.
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It’s more difficult but not impossible. And now all I can think of is having a vacation all to myself.thanks for sharing this article with us…
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